Fandango’s Provocative Question #139

Today Fandango is asking us:

Do you consider yourself today to be more of a spontaneous person or more of a stable person? Which characteristic in others, spontaneity or stability, do you prefer? Why?

Today, I do not consider myself to be either. I know I am definitely the most UN-spontaneous person in the world as I adhere to my routines like superglue and the mere thought of having to make a spontaneous decision causes my brain to open 101 more computer tabs of all the “how would I do”, “what if” and “will I recover from this change” questions. None of which likely affect the action should I have been spontaneous.

On the other hand….I am not stable either. I am prone to rash decisions. I would not go so far as to say those rash decisions are spontaneous, but rather, made out of panic (for lack of a better word).

For example, to me, being spontaneous means a phone call at 3 p.m. to meet a friend for dinner at 5 p.m. Every fiber of my being wants to say yes, but the brain immediately starts with “what about what I laid out for dinner, can I cook it tomorrow, I have a meeting tomorrow, will I have time to cook it tomorrow if I don’t do it today, will it keep another day, this sets my meal plan back a day, I need to let husband know, will he mind, no of course he won’t mind, the dog will need walked, can he wait an extra 1/2 hour, I should leave work now, what if there is traffic on the way home, I will never make it by 5 p.m., do they have food I am hungry for, is she making reservations, do I need a mask to go there-no probably not-it is going to be loud, I am going to be there for hours, I left my pills at home I hope I don’t forget to take them” to which I the respond to said friend practically instantaneously “no, sorry, I am tied up tonight”. Yes, it is INCREDIBLY exhausting.

On the other hand, the unstable rash decisions are…oh look, traffic is slow ahead, I will exit at the next available exit (which, by the way, are few and far between in my rural neck of the woods) and then spend an additional 1/2 hour reminding myself how STUPID I am for forgetting this was the farm road during harvest season. I think those rash decisions tend to make me unstable. Or rather, I feel very unstable after doing something when I should have known better.

So to succinctly answer Fandango’s Provocative Question, I am neither stable nor spontaneous. If I had to choose one and be good at one, it would be stable. It seems to be the calmer of the two to me.

Published by SadiRose

Blogging gets the noise in my head least for a little while. I use blogging to weed through all that noise and find the humor in each situation, even if it takes some time to find it. I am not selling anything, just sharing experiences as a mother, Amma, wife, paralegal, volunteer, Muslimah, sister, daughter, mother-in-law, woman.

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